I met up with a guy 'Online' a few weeks ago, and we've been chatting online, texting & over the phone. All was good at the start, for the first few days until he told me he had gone to bed while we were still on the phone. That was o.k. until he kept asking me what I was wearing, about my preferences with sex etc. I'm not a prude, but something about this guy didn't feel right. During the day, if we talk, text, etc it's fine, but at night after talking & everytime he goes to bed & talks, it gets weird! I do like this guy, but every time that happens, it puts me off. Is it me, or should I trust my instinct about this guy?

Originally Posted by chikgrl

I met up with a guy 'Online' a few weeks ago, and we've been chatting online, texting & over the phone. All was good at the start, for the first few days until he told me he had gone to bed while we were still on the phone. That was o.k. until he kept asking me what I was wearing, about my preferences with sex etc. I'm not a prude, but something about this guy didn't feel right. During the day, if we talk, text, etc it's fine, but at night after talking & everytime he goes to bed & talks, it gets weird! I do like this guy, but every time that happens, it puts me off. Is it me, or should I trust my instinct about this guy?

Always trust your instincts! They are never wrong. If you have to talk yourself out of feeling a certain way then you need to listen to what your body and gut are trying to tell you.
Sounds like he's getting off while talking to you at night. In essence he's having phone sex with you without letting you know. He probably figures it's cheaper then those 900 numbers! He's being nice during conversations during the day to get what he wants at night. I'd drop him like a rock.
Ask yourself is this what you really want and deserve?
You deserve more respect then that aren't you? Time to raise your standards.

Always remember, doubt means don't!

Best of luck to you!
Cheers!

To put it bluntly..
He goes to bed and has one hell of a time jerking while he is asking you all the sexual questions.. Jesus, girl, Think...

Always, ALWAYS go by your gut instinct. If it doesn't feel right, then you can be sure it isn't. You're gut instinct is never wrong.
He's a jerk using you without your consent for his own pleasure.

Instinct chikgrl, we women have it for a reason and it is always right. As the others have said he is USING you for his own gratification, keeping you interested during the day being nice and polite so he can get his rocks off in the evening when he is in bed. Perhaps you could tell him next time he wants to call u while in bed he is to deposit a sum of money into a bank account for you to pay for your services because he is treating you like a phone sex partner. Better still tell him you are sending him a bill for all the other calls and I bet he won't call call again

Well i understand what your saying have had the same thing happen to me.

Its like they are a Cybil if you get what i mean .
The charm and all is how they fish you in.
And yes do trust that gut feeling .
You have already doubts about this .
So whats thats telling you.
Listen to your inner soul move on you can do better.
Just my thoughts.

Ladies your Thoughts are corect..

I have been on this website and others, and all I ever encountered was some men who are really not interested in anything but to get their rocks off be it by email, chatting, etc...

And just read some profiles..All wanting Fun, Light Encounters, No Comitements... And let us not forget the hordes who are married and want discreet affairs...

More chances meeting that special soul at the bus stop or your local laundry mat...

That is why I am here for friendship, nothing more nothing less...

Originally Posted by chikgrl

I met up with a guy 'Online' a few weeks ago, and we've been chatting online, texting & over the phone. All was good at the start, for the first few days until he told me he had gone to bed while we were still on the phone. That was o.k. until he kept asking me what I was wearing, about my preferences with sex etc. I'm not a prude, but something about this guy didn't feel right. During the day, if we talk, text, etc it's fine, but at night after talking & everytime he goes to bed & talks, it gets weird! I do like this guy, but every time that happens, it puts me off. Is it me, or should I trust my instinct about this guy?

You must explain here what is weird? Especially when you have developed some liking for this guy and are making yourself available for...

It's better to ask his expectations from you and explain to him what you desire. Human nature is a bit weird...sometimes you like something for some reason and at others you may dislike/ disown the same bloody thing...Think

Instincts are also the outcome of brain...in relations it's the heart and the head that should be put at task.

Cheers!

Originally Posted by chikgrl

I met up with a guy 'Online' a few weeks ago, and we've been chatting online, texting & over the phone. All was good at the start, for the first few days until he told me he had gone to bed while we were still on the phone. That was o.k. until he kept asking me what I was wearing, about my preferences with sex etc. I'm not a prude, but something about this guy didn't feel right. During the day, if we talk, text, etc it's fine, but at night after talking & everytime he goes to bed & talks, it gets weird! I do like this guy, but every time that happens, it puts me off. Is it me, or should I trust my instinct about this guy?

chikgrl I would rather trust a women's instinct than a man's reason..I might send a wrong signal of generalizing but i was never wrong with my instincts.

It is you who is really in contact with this guy, so you know if you are being exploited which made you doubted his true intentions with you.

Originally Posted by Christmasangel64

Always trust your instincts! They are never wrong. If you have to talk yourself out of feeling a certain way then you need to listen to what your body and gut are trying to tell you.
Sounds like he's getting off while talking to you at night. In essence he's having phone sex with you without letting you know. He probably figures it's cheaper then those 900 numbers! He's being nice during conversations during the day to get what he wants at night. I'd drop him like a rock.
Ask yourself is this what you really want and deserve?
You deserve more respect then that aren't you? Time to raise your standards.

Always remember, doubt means don't!

Best of luck to you!
Cheers!

Thanks for your advice, I think because I've been out of the 'Dating Scene' for so long, I've taken it for granted maybe that this guy was as nice as he seemed. And you're right, I do deserve love & respect, thanks.