What do you tell a 6 month old boy that his father doesn't want to know us. For no good reson. It is hard on me as i have fathers parents about 5 - 10 minutes up the road. What do i do. As his father sound go on with your lifes and forget about me and think i am just dead. So what do i do if his parents what to came and see us. do i say yes or no as he don't want us in his life so what do i do.

Can you also help with teething and my son not sleeping. It is sending me crazy everything that is going on. and upsetting my son.

my baby was teething not long ago n i let her chew on my hand! that settled her! n y punish the gramps they r normaly betta than ur parents cos theyve already been through parenthood!

Tis why puppys chew everything...its a frustrating time for both concerned...but just remember he is a baby and they all go thru it...u try to have a nap wen bub goes to sleep no matter wat time day/night it is...little is better than none at all the housework can wait

Forget this son of a ?$%# he is not worth your worries your son will understand your action one of these days as for the parents it's up to you, if you get along with them i don't see why not they are the grand parents no matter what the other ass&?*9 is. As for the crying toothache patience is the only remedy like sexcymama said they all go through it no matter what you do.

Patience & Love is a new parent best tools

Take care

This is a tough one. The fact he is still around makes it very complicated and likely that your son will find out some other way. I think possibly give the guy time to think it through. You can tell your son white lies to for the moment at that age nobody tells children the truth about anything. I a year or two the guy may rethink things and may want to be involved at some level. The bottom line is this guy is a selfish p***k and if he does not come round maybe telling your son about him and making it clear to your son the the father has the problem and is the p***k, not him. To be honest, you are probably better off without him altogether. I know a woman who had a child by another man, but the child thinks the current long term boyfriend is the father. This seems to be working out so far,(child is about 11) but the biological father is totally out of the picture and the child will eventually have to be told the truth. To be honest, I have'nt a clue what you should do, but there are a few thoughts anyway.

Tell the young boy nothing for now....at 6 months of age...he isnt going to understand it anyhow.....when you DO tell him....TELL HIM THE TRUTH. If you lie to the child....you are going to have to backpedal at some point to explain and cover your lies...then the child will resent you for your dishonesty. The truth is the only way. It sounds like the biological father is a useless piece of ****. Not worth the air he breathes. People like that dont even deserve to father children. You would quite likely be far better off without him. As far as the grandparents go....there is no reason to allow this to affect their relationship with their grandson. That only will make a bad situation worse. If they want to be doting grandparents to the boy...then by all means....the boy can only benefit from it. As someone who was once a father ( to a girl who would be turning 18 very soon....but died at 5 months of age) , it really boils my blood to hear of useless pieces of **** like this guy you mention. I would give my life to have her back. In fact, im so ******* angry right now, i need to go. Well after taking a few moments to let my blood pressure drop, i will finish my post. Only those people who have lost a child TRULY understand the pain. The pain NEVER goes away, it only gets dealt with one day at a time for the rest of our lives. For thoses people who father or mother a child...and adopt an attitude such as this piece of **** you mentioned, they do NOT deserve to be a part of the childs life. "tell him im dead" OMFG...what a disrespectful, ignorant, selfish, shallow thing to want. Let that piece of **** become a distant memory for you . Move on with your life and always know you are better off for it. There is SO MUCH i could say on this issue, but i firmly believe i've said enough. Anyone who has bothered to read this far will understand im sure.

Originally Posted by chivalryexists

Tell the young boy nothing for now....at 6 months of age...he isnt going to understand it anyhow.....when you DO tell him....TELL HIM THE TRUTH. If you lie to the child....you are going to have to backpedal at some point to explain and cover your lies...then the child will resent you for your dishonesty.

He is going to wonder where his daddy is and why everyone else has a daddy and not him. If you tell him the truth too early, he will think there is something wrong with him, that his daddy does not want him. I think you should tell him something like his Daddy has gone to work abroad until he is old enough to understand his daddy is a toe rag. And hopefully in the meantime you will find someone to be his daddy in the meantime and it won't matter. The grandparents, have lost their rights in my mind by their sons actions, so unless they have your best interests at heart and want to help you I would dump them. Again, if you have decided not to acknowledge the father, then they have to obey your wish and only come on your terms. Again just further thoughts, but as a single male with no kids, what do I know about this ?

wait until the kid is old enough to ask and then start telling him the truth, do not blame the father but as the bub gets older and more mature 8-15 explain your feelings but not the hurt and pain it has caused you.then try and assist the child in any way to get to know him, at least then when he has grown up he will understand it was not yours or his fault.
as for the teeth try frozen fish fingers for a couple of minutes at a time (with supervision) the cold helps numb the gums and the crumbs help break the skin for the teeth to break out (not to mention being a taste treat for some one so young) worked better than bonjello for my two boys

Originally Posted by belking

What do you tell a 6 month old boy that his father doesn't want to know us. For no good reson. It is hard on me as i have fathers parents about 5 - 10 minutes up the road. What do i do. As his father sound go on with your lifes and forget about me and think i am just dead. So what do i do if his parents what to came and see us. do i say yes or no as he don't want us in his life so what do i do.

Can you also help with teething and my son not sleeping. It is sending me crazy everything that is going on. and upsetting my son.

Hi , maybe i can offer my opinion based on personal experience,
When i was married we had a baby and at about 6 or 7 months of age i left, i used to visit but because she was so young she didnt remember me , which was heartbreaking, but it was even more heart breaking for me when she did remember and became upset when i left at the end of the day, so for the next 5 or 6 years i didnt visit at all and thought it would be better for her to forget about me and get on with her new daddy, anyway after about 5 new daddys later i got back in touch when she was 14, she was in hospital for mutilating herself after years of substance abuse, shes 20 now, she never rings me nor has she ever wished me happy birthday, when i visit her , well its not nice as she seems very lost and lonely, everthing ive tried to communicate with her goes out the door..

I dont think this is a result of me not being there, i think it is a result of too many men going in and out of my exwifes life, and the stability and security was lost for my daughter..

i think if your ex is out of the picture, thats ok , but i wouldnt advise you to go from man to man in order to find a father figure, when you can be a father figure as well and give that security,,, and if you do meet a guy, make sure he likes kids and that he wont run after a few months, i think that is the worst thing for a child,

must be 3 cents worth

Originally Posted by onetoone

Hi , maybe i can offer my opinion based on personal experience,
When i was married we had a baby and at about 6 or 7 months of age i left, i used to visit but because she was so young she didnt remember me , which was heartbreaking, but it was even more heart breaking for me when she did remember and became upset when i left at the end of the day, so for the next 5 or 6 years i didnt visit at all and thought it would be better for her to forget about me and get on with her new daddy, anyway after about 5 new daddys later i got back in touch when she was 14, she was in hospital for mutilating herself after years of substance abuse, shes 20 now, she never rings me nor has she ever wished me happy birthday, when i visit her , well its not nice as she seems very lost and lonely, everthing ive tried to communicate with her goes out the door..

I dont think this is a result of me not being there, i think it is a result of too many men going in and out of my exwifes life, and the stability and security was lost for my daughter..

i think if your ex is out of the picture, thats ok , but i wouldnt advise you to go from man to man in order to find a father figure, when you can be a father figure as well and give that security,,, and if you do meet a guy, make sure he likes kids and that he wont run after a few months, i think that is the worst thing for a child,

must be 3 cents worth

yeah i strongly agree. I don't have any kids but I know a few single mothers and when I date a single mother, I refuse to have anything to do with the kid until well into the relationship. There is nothing worse than daddies coming and going and the mother putting each new daddy before the kid. The most important thing is that the child knows they are loved and come first IMHO. Any guy who does not accept this is going to leave once he gets bored anyway, so don't waste your families time on these guys. One of my sisters is a single mum and she has a wonderful relationship with her son. She always put him first and made sure every guy knew that. The guys came and went, but the mother son relationship stayed strong and he is a good, well balanced kid. Also, the father figure does not necessarily have to be your partner. I am to some extent a father figure to my nephew. We do a lot of father/son type stuff together and we talk about a lot of stuff. But I am still not sure what you should do about the kids real father.

Onetoone a good resource on your daughters topic is http://www.helpguide.org/mental/self_injury.htm
Maybe you want to start a new thread to get other's experience on this, as it is quite common?